Ashley Gets Lost

I have straight up not been having a great time, my friends. I have been having good times, but in general, not great. My first cold in years lingered, my neck hurt when I coughed, I got my period, and then, just when I thought I was feeling better, I had a couple days of stomach trouble. Even then, when I felt “better”, I’ve still been very tired, but fine, I’ll finish telling you about my trip to Albania.

Let’s start with that majestic dude just standing on that demon. I’m guessing it’s someone important since it had plexiglass over the wall to protect it from all the smoochers. They also had that over in front of the virgin. Church just goes to show you, different strokes for different folks. Some people want to kiss a virgin, some people want to kiss this angel with a sword, and some people think maybe that demon is a little misunderstood and could probably use a little kiss as well.

There are not a lot of thrift stores here in Greece, and the ones that are here aren’t great. Albania seems to have a thriving resell market. Maria suggested I go to one, and I’m not sure I actually found it. There were all kinds of these metal structures with stuff just going almost all the way to the ceiling! And people selling stuff in little booths.

Look at this delightful chaos! The chances of the people there speaking English were slim, but everyone wanted to help me or show me things. I was not expecting this type of situation at all, and I was very overwhelmed. I looked around a bit and left empty handed. But then later Olya and I were on a walk about, and I found a lady in a different part of town just selling stuff in front of a building entrance.

So I bought this coat for a cool ten bucks. I love it so much. I think it’s wool, but I need to inspect it a little further. I love the fur around the hood. It’s so much fun! I will be prepared mentally and physically (I was starving when I went last time) to thrift harder next time.

We went out for brunch one morning, and I tried these Albanian pancakes, which were delicious! Thick and chewy, dipped in honey! All this food and two fancy coffees. We left full and I think only 13 euros poorer than when we went in.

Also the bakeries here are filled with an obscene amount of treats. Believe it or not, I only went once. We got three fancy treats and a loaf of bread for less than five bucks!

First I want you to see this beautiful angel next to a mural she likes. Then I want you to see how she opens wine. One minute she’s looking all cute and matching the wall, and the next she’s opening wine like a raccoon trying to break into a cyber truck looking for trash. I was shaken to the core until the wine started to kick in and take the edge off.

Ok so first of all, this statue of liberty was proudly displayed in Olya’s furnished apartment. Like it was on a pedestal next to the tv. I see she has moved it to just near the cheese grater, which is a bold choice. BUT THEN I needed some pants washed, and we decided to try the dryer out on the patio for the first time. It was leaking water, so I tried to see if I could figure out the issue. Imagine my shock when I found this 9/11 memorial plaque tucked behind the dryer.

When you move it the eagle and flag appear and disappear. So yeah. That’s weird, right? Hahahaha

Olya didn’t have a coffee maker, but she would offer you a mug of the finest Albanian energy drink, served out of a 1.5 liter bottle. I’m not naming names, but I have it on good authority that if you accidentally drink a whole liter and a half of pit bull energy drink, you will not feel good.

Olya is very good at making delicious snack plates. Ask her about the time that her purse was really heavy. Spoiler alert: Her grocery bag was full so she put a whole jar of pickles in her purse. These pickles are not on my approved pickles list. Give me dill or give me death. If a bitch wants a dill pickle around here, she has to make it herself.

Olya pointed out that she thinks of me whenever she walks by this lingerie store. Someone let Cotonella out of her cage!

I bought this nice boot box for Crash. It came with some boots that I guess I’ll wear, but Crash thinks I just bought him a box. I didn’t think he’d get right in immediately, but he did. He thinks he’s so cool and special, but he’s just another beautiful puss in a box.

On my second to last night in Albania, we went out for drinks with Maria. I accidentally got pretty drunk because cocktails are actually cheap there. I was drinking fancy gin and tonics for six euros each. We had such a fun night

On my actual last night, I opted to stay at a hotel by the airport. I needed to be there bright and early, and I didn’t want to mess around with waking up extra extra early and driving. The hotel was very nice and left me a note with cookies! I’ve had people write my name ASHELY before, but never ASHELEY.

So I’ve probably definitely forgotten about multiple things that I meant to tell you. Did I tell you about the 30 euro massage I got? That the lady told me to put my clothes on the chair and then stood there and watched me undress? Which was fine, we all know I like taking my clothes off, but it was a new experience! Also she never had me flip over. It was a backside only massage. I should’ve offered her another 30 for the front?

I had such a great time in Albania. Everyone is so nice. Lady friends/family walk around holding hands or arm in arm. Almost all of the men have the same military haircut that they get touched up regularly. The small amount of nature I got up into was majestic. The food was amazing and cheap.

Thank you for having me and showing me such an amazing time Olya! I can’t wait to go back and see more.

We just wrapped up Carnival season here in Greece. Our carpenters are coming to build my wardrobe and other storage for us soon, so I need to get my room cleaned out. That’s fun because I need to remove all the current storage in my room, but I’ll also need to be like getting dressed every day. Ooooof.